Jeppson’s Malort

My Price: $31.95

Country/Area: Chicago, USA

Distillery: Carl Jeppson Company

Proof/ABV: 70 Proof/ 35% ABV

Mash Bill: 87 Octane, 10% Unfiltered Chicago River Water, 3% Gambler Pee (numbers and ingredients are approximations)

Barrel: Aged in goat urine soaked straw harvested from the floors of bars across the midwest

Age: 5 years. That’s not how old it is that’s how much a shot ages you

Nose: Gasoline, Forest Fire, Anger

Taste: Bitter, Earth, Hatred of your fellow man

Review: Many consider Jeppson’s Malort to be the worst tasting liqueur in the world. Although I’m not sure it has earned that title it is definitely an acquired taste and is likely drunk more as a dare than as something actually enjoyable. The taste is deeply bitter and the taste lingers for what seems like forever. Because of this you should probably keep a bottle in your bar so your friends can taste it and prove their worth. Cheer!

My Rating: Stock it, even if only to laugh at your friends reactions when trying it.

May the miles you hike be filled with wonder and the glasses you raise be filled with whiskey.

Cheers!

Rating scale:

-Spit: Don’t bother with this one. If a friend gives you a dram of it, are they even your friend?

-Shoot: Good enough to get you drunk.

-Sip: Tasty enough to enjoy neat or on the rocks.

-Stock: I’d recommend keeping a bottle on hand.